Emotions and Reactions

Many parents have reported the following reactions when their baby was admitted to NICU:

• Shock over the NICU admission or premature birth
• Worry over baby’s condition and matters related to the present and the future
• Feelings of helplessness and loss of control due to the great deal of uncertainty
  
• Guilt and self-blame over what was done or not done during the pregnancy
  
• Anger towards self and others
• Grief and disappointment over the loss of a “normal” birth experience and healthy baby
• Stress over having to disclose about your baby’s NICU admission and medical condition

Every parent is unique and may experience the NICU journey differently. There is no “right” or “wrong” feeling. It may be helpful to find someone trusted to share and process your emotions and reactions during this period.

Click here to read up more about emotional wellness after pregnancy.

Tips and techniques on coping

• Take care of your basic needs, such as staying hydrated, having nutritious meals on time and getting adequate rest.
• Make time for self-care. This may involve taking some time out from NICU so that you can focus on spending time with loved ones. You may not feel like it is an appropriate time to do something that makes you happy, but it will help increase your capacity to be there for baby!
• Consider mindfulness or breathing exercises to deal with stress. Find out more about breathing exercises here.
  
• Accept help from family and friends. Practical help may allow you more time to focus on things such as visiting your baby in NICU or getting more rest. Do not be afraid to ask for help if you need to.
• Celebrate successes, positives and progress, even those that seem small – including yours and your baby’s
• Accept that there may be “ups and downs” during your baby’s NICU admission. It may be helpful to try taking things one day at a time.
• Focus on what is within your control. This may include how you schedule your time for different activities, or what you want to achieve for the day. Focus on one thing at a time, going at a pace that is comfortable for you.
• Identify and acknowledge your feelings.
• Reach out to your partner to share your feelings with one another. You may find that you both have different ways of coping. Accept these differences, even as you continue to support and connect with one another.
• Talk to someone about how you’re feeling. This could be your partner, trusted family member or friend. If you would like more professional support in processing your feelings, you may also reach out to the Medical Social Workers.